Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
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