I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
no you cant smoke seaweed
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
we should paint friendship bongs
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