i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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