What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
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