idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Randomize
