I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
