he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
