im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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