when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
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