I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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