What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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