Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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