i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
did you just send me my own nude
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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