Already got asked if we're dating
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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