I wanna bring you to show and tell
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
