U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
