garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
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