Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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