I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize
