Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Randomize
