I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
