Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
