i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
