Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
