That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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