im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
hell yes lets make some ravioli
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize