I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I could make wine with my vomit
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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