I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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