Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
ok first of all what the fuck
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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