If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
