too bad you live with your parents still
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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