This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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