I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Enjoy the penises
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
