My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
