This girl is more easily done than said...
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
