I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Randomize
