I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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