he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
you never un-have a 4some
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
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