Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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