Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
