Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
