I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
this will be a night to untag.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
did you just send me my own nude
Can't talk, ducks in the car
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
