David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
