I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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