this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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