Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
