You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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