she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
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