so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
you never un-have a 4some
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
