their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize