I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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