Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize