Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize